Eggs Woodhouse

My husband and I like watching the show Archer, which is basically about the antics of a James Bond-like guy with a drinking problem and mommy issues, among other things.  Archer enjoys a certain egg dish that he makes his poor, downtrodden English valet named Woodhouse prepare.  The recipe can be found in Adam Reed's book How to Archer: The Ultimate Guide to Espionage and Style and Women and Also Cocktails Ever Written and is ridiculously convoluted and expensive, with an estimate of $130 per serving if you make it exactly as specified.  My husband requested Eggs Woodhouse for his birthday breakfast.  I don't have $260 to spend on eggs (if I'm putting this kind of work into a recipe, I want some, too!), but we all do things for the ones we love, so I decided to give it a go.

Before making it, I went over the recipe and slightly adapted it to make it a little more stream lined and a little less bankruptcy inducing.  For example, my salt was just regular salt, the ham was nice sundried tomato rosemary ham from the deli, and I skipped the saffron and caviar garnishes.  You will be happy to know that I did use BROWN eggs though, just like the recipe says!  I also used a recipe for Hollandaise sauce (from AllRecipes) that doesn't need a double boiler or metal bowl over simmering water because I have don't have either of those things.

After a practice run making poached eggs the night before and a solid hour and a half of work in the kitchen the next morning, the eggs were ready!  The recipe may have been a bit of a pain to make, but now I know how to poach eggs, make Hollandaise sauce, and make creamed spinach.  Even better, I'm happy to say that Eggs Woodhouse are delicious.  All the flavors go together very well and we found it extremely enjoyable.  Definitely won't be making it all the time (it also took half an hour to wash all the dishes), but I would make it again for special occasions if my husband asked nicely.

 After all that work, I forgot the paprika!  It was added after the photo was taken.  Toast, too.

Eggs Woodhouse for Two

Creamed Spinach:

2 C tightly packed fresh spinach, chopped finely

3 T butter, divided

1/2 tsp salt, divided

1/8 tsp pepper

2 T whole wheat flour

2/3 C milk

1 bay leaf

8 drops hot sauce

Melt 1 tablespoon of the butter in a skillet over medium-high heat.  Add spinach, 1/4 teaspoon of the salt, and the pepper.  Saute until spinach wilts and softens, about 2 minutes.  Remove from heat. 

In a small sauce pan, melt the remaining 2 tablespoons of butter over medium-high heat.  Whisk in the flour to make a roux.  Whisk constantly until mixture bubbles and begins to turn slightly golden, about 1 minute.  Whisk in the milk 1/3 C at a time, making sure the sauce is completely smooth before adding more milk.  Immediately add bay leaf, hot sauce, and remaining 1/4 teaspoon salt.  Cook, stirring constantly, until sauce comes to a simmer and thickens.  Cook for 1 more minute to make sure there is no raw flour taste.  Discard bay leaf and stir in sauteed spinach.  Heat through, then cover the pan with a lid and set aside

Poached Eggs:

4 fresh eggs (they hold their shape better)

1 tbsp white vinegar

I made my poached eggs exactly according to Alton Brown's video, and they turned out perfectly!  Below I've basically written down what Alton says to do.

Crack each egg into its own small bowl.  Heat 1 1/2 inches of water in a large nonstick skillet over medium.  Use a digital probe thermometer to track the temperature.  Adjust the heat as necessary to keep the water at 190 degrees.  Stir in the vinegar.  Right before you're ready to add the eggs, use a nonstick skillet safe slotted spoon to scrape the bubbles from the bottom of the skillet. 

Wait a few seconds for the water to go still (you don't want to make egg drop soup!), then quickly and carefully add an egg to the skillet by turning the bowl on its side and allowing water to go into the skillet so the egg gently slides out of the bowl.  Repeat with the other 3 eggs.  Set timer for 4 minutes and 30 seconds.  Continue to monitor the temperature of the water as the eggs cook. 

When their time is up, gently remove the eggs (in the order you placed them in the skillet) with the slotted spoon.  They may stick to the bottom of the skillet a bit, but you should be able to gently jiggle them loose.  Remove the eggs to a plate lined with 3 layers of paper towels, and cut off any excessive bits of egg white with the edge of the slotted spoon.

Blender Hollandaise Sauce: 

 2 egg yolks

1/8 tsp yellow mustard

4 drops hot sauce

1/4 C butter

Place egg yolks, mustard, hot sauce, and lemon juice in a small bowl (one big enough for an immersion blender to fit into) and blend with the immersion blender for a few seconds.  Place butter in a glass measuring cup and microwave until completely melted and quite hot, about 1 minute if the butter is straight from the fridge.  Turn immersion blender back on and blend the yolk mixture while you add the butter in a thin stream.  Blend until sauce thickens and is smooth.

Additional Ingredients:

-4 artichoke bottoms (I used canned, fresh ones would be better)

-4 oz shaved deli ham, sliced chiffonade

-2 button mushrooms, sliced as thinly as you can

-paprika

-buttered toast (optional)

To Assemble:

Prepare artichoke bottoms, ham, and mushroom, and place in the refrigerator until needed.  Make the creamed spinach and set aside.  Make the poached eggs and set aside.  While the eggs poach, you should have enough time to put bread in the toaster and make the Hollandaise sauce.  Be sure to work quickly after the eggs are done cooking because you don't want them to get cold!

Place the pan of creamed spinach back on the stove over low heat so it can warm up for a minute.  Heat the ham and mushrooms.  I just stuck the covered bowl of ham in the microwave for 45 seconds and the mushrooms for 20 seconds.

Divide the creamed spinach between two plates.  Arrange the artichoke bottoms over the spinach, then top each artichoke bottom with a poached egg.  Sprinkle the ham over the egg, then sprinkle on the sliced mushroom.  Pour Hollandaise sauce over everything and sprinkle with a bit of paprika.  Serve with toast on the side if you'd like.

Yield: 2 servings